18 Things Every Christian Woman Should Know About Christian Men

young_menThere tons of books and articles that talk about how a woman can "find" a man. Do you really think that the use of rules or any other special tactics are the best things to place a woman on the path towards marriage? Please remember that bible says that "He who finds a wife, finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord" (NIV) Proverbs 18:22. For all of the ladies that read this post, it is important to understand that God does not intend for you to go out and find a husband. He intends for your future husband to go and find you.

God needs to prepare all of us for marriage (men and women). Often times we remain unmarried, because we are not ready in God's eyes. 

To my sisters in Christ…if you truly want a Christian man in your life, there are some things I think you should know. I'm talking about a true authentic Christian man. I'm referring to a man that is not perfect, but he loves God deeply. I'm referring to a man that will treat you like queen and lead your family as he follows Christ.

I am going to take a little liberty and speak for authentic Christian men around world. If you are a single female, here is what you should know about some of the things that go on in the mind of authentic Christian men as it relates to you. (If you are a married woman, some of these things may help you out too)

1. We love God even though we may not always show it the same manner that you do.

2. We are not afraid of marriage. 

3. We are not perfect just because we love God. Learn to deal with our imperfections. We learn to deal with yours.  

4. A positive and happy woman will always be more attractive than a negative and angry one.

5. What goes on between us should stay between us. Your girlfriend and/or family don't need to know everything. 

6. Gossip is unattractive.

7. Selfishness is really unattractive.

8. Less clothing does not make you more attractive. We want to see your breasts, but not until we put a ring on your finger.

9. Please go easy on the makeup or learn to apply it properly. We are looking to marry a woman not a clown.  

10. Don't be quick to be jealous of our relationships with our mothers. How we treat her will be a good indication of how we will treat you. 

11. Although SOME of us are prophets, NONE of us have the ability to read minds. If something is on your mind please say so. Clues are for Sherlock Holmes. 

12. Authentic Christian men genuinely like to help other people. That does not me we care any less about you. 

13. We are not like the other people who have hurt you in the past. 

14. We aren't as obsessed with your weight as your are. 

15. If we comment about exercise or eating habits it is because we care about your health. We want you to be around to spend time with us.

16. The fact that you have children is not stopping us from getting to know you.

17. Whatever we like before marriage (food, sports, video games, etc), we will continue to like after marriage. 18. There are constructive ways to ask us to do things, to informs us and to correct us. Nagging is not one of those ways.

So, what do you think about the list? Is there anything else that should be added?

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  • Michael

    Women say that they don’t want men that go for looks. Why shouldn’t a man go mainly on looks? Do women go for the heart of the man?
    Romans 8 mentions God’s love that nothing should get in the way of love (that means possessions),but will ANY Christian woman marry a homeless / broke man that is Godly? Of course NOT!!
    You want “security”(possessions), you better have a sexy body.
    It’s a tradeoff that Christians don’t like to admit, a business transaction.

  • Airstar

    This writeup is just wat I needed to read. . Am really going tru a phase dat if I had know dis; it wudn’t hav started at all. . Thank God all d same. .

  • Lisha

    Such excellent advise!! Especially about the having children part, I have two beautiful kids & I know the media likes to talk down about a woman having kids bringing them into a relationship which I seem to think is unfair. My kids would be a great asset to my future relationship & I want a future husband who will treat them as if they were his own along with our future kids.

  • Priscilla Lenora Miles

    Speaking as a Christian…Please understand that the man is being responsible by trying to take care of his children without the stress and burden of maintaining a home. Conversely, he is giving his girls the womanly companionship they need through his mother, and helping his mother at the same time! This is Logical Thinking! This man has every right not to concern himself with a relationship until he has everything in place. He already has a life! He cannot and will not increase his responsibility (emotionally). I have much respect for a man who follows order, but believe me, if there is going to be an additional person in his life, that person will be adding and not subtracting, multiplying and not dividing! If God is allowing you to be in this man’s life then I suggest you be what you were ordained to be in the relationship. Don’t make the mistake of being what you want rather than what the man needs! If you become an addition to his life, believe me, he will ultimately make the decision to add what compliments him, his children, and his family, which is the most important to him…at this time! Then you too have become a part of that priority and accountability! Remember, God looks at the man when he observes the family! By the way, is your relationship based on Christianity (no sex) because God does not honor or bless our mess! I’m just saying…!

  • Priscilla Lenora Miles

    You are on point my Brother! Good Advice!

  • Justpassinthrough

    I actually know a couple of couples (haha) that this happened to.The women actually weren’t like scouring the globe for a husband,and they were busy doing ministry things,and they got to a point where they were like,”Alright God,let me know if he’s the one,and then I’ll go out with him”
    And while it totally worked for them and worked with their personalities,it’s not for everyone,so you kind of need to know which approach is the bestfor you personally.
    Hope this helped!

  • Democracy forever

    I worked as a nurse in the emergency room. A Mexican middle-aged doctor was always looking at greener pastures. His idea was that a white or fair-skinned thin and sexy blonde blue-eyed woman was the ideal beautiful woman. One day he was lusting after a beautiful tall blonde, blue eyed woman. It turned out she was mentally-challenged and no etiquette. Her breath stunk. Looks can be deceiving. A sexy woman could be a tormenting spirit, the devil himself. Be careful men.

  • Democracy forever

    Do not be so desperate my friend. It is better to eat alone than have somebody with you that torments you in that or any other fashion. If it does not look or feel right, it is probably not right. Ask the Lord to show you signs. Pray everyday. Only the Lord can give you comfort and love in your single lifelihood.

  • Democracy forever

    What I would do, as a Christian, give him the same treatment. If he complains, express your feelings. Do not allow vain “forgive me’s”. Ask him to own his behavior as well. Then bargain with him. He goes through a battery of lie detector tests that prove his intentions are not tainted with lust. If he is fed up with you and he really wishes to move on, time for Christian woman marriage counselor. Many Christian men believe women are second class citizens. They do not treat women with delicacy and pure unadulterated love. Few do. The truth will set one free.

  • Democracy forever

    God not only expects prayer but action behind prayer. One should not things like that slide between Christians. You bring your concerns to the floor and your Pastor.

  • Democracy forever

    I guess you are not used to this kind of love a mother and a son. You should have noticed all this between the two before you married. It is your fault. Ask God to change your perspective on how you look at them. Time for big miracle of some kind in your life so you will not be miserable. God answers!

  • Democracy forever

    Is there anyone in your life that can help you fill your void of your better half? If there is, bring someone-your uncle, cousin, sister-in-Christ, etc., to help cross the bridge. If your husband refuses to let them in, then you ask him to change. Let mom find herself someone else in her life to keep her busy. Do not ever separate them completely. If you love your spouse, you have bind your heart to God not to hate her and feel compassion for her.

  • Democracy forever

    If you ever want to be the most important thing in a man’s life, it may never happen in this relationship. Giving of yourself- you will be rewarded by God giving you peace and love. If you choose to be a good steward, a helping hand for others regardless of what life throws down at you, this is a lifelong friend here for you. Do not expect anything in return, ever from them! You may be disappointed if your do. Choose-friendship or a disappointing love relationship.

  • Democracy forever

    That is exactly what I do to ward-off the leeches. I wear an engagement ring. The man that God wants for me will not see the engagement ring and will try to get to know me in some manner or the other. I do not dress up for anybody but solely to represent Jesus.

  • Democracy forever

    What happened after 2 years?

  • Angel

    um…that sounds silly…the wearing ‘I’m not available I’m engaged but I want a man willing to overlook integrity & still pursue me”. Maybe fast & pray for God to reveal if He is really saying do that part.

  • Angel

    Chase or shows interest? Big difference. Today’s chasing a man is lol near stalking sometimes, not the Ruth Boaz make your interest known & then let him man up.

  • Angel

    Stop second guessing what you already know as a Christian woman. May God bless you with a Godly mate one day!

  • Angel

    um…attractive yes that’s realistic & healthy…spectacular and stunning ‘seems’ unrealistic & a bit superficial.

  • Leah1131

    Lol That’s funny – Sir your in the wrong to even mention that The bible says that the man must be PROVIDERS of the caretakers and is a SIN not to provide ect ect So marrying a homeless isn’t a provider is it? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder -Living in ungodly society uphold beauty the wrong way So men be a role models of Christ As to have self control as to likewise Jesus did Women should go for upright man in God God did not have intentions for man/women for business transactions lol

  • leah1131

    Amen!!!! I really feel for you and sorry you got hurt They know better lol The scriptures say only date if ready for marriage but men don’t listen head down wrong path I see this happen all the time in congregations But those so called “Chistian men” are pursing the worldly ways and not listening to God Be glad that these men let you go! You better off that way anyways w#o men with no self control You be happy doing what your suppose too Because that indecent Shameful acts of them and not upright and in vain NOT Christ- like Only to lead them in ; unhappy marriage divorces cheating diseases This why God warns us to be pure because he dont want us to get more hurt So be glad these so called “Christian men” have let you go because they are not following righteous path only to lead in “worldy ways” You keep doing what your doing and all goes well for you Much love

  • lisa

    why do women need to ask u to do something that u all can clearly see want doing and might be too difficult for the woman? please men need to tae initiative

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