If you have ever been to a choir rehearsal, chances are that you have met one of, if not all of these people. (In no particular order)
The Diva
This person is usually a woman and usually a soprano, but not always. “The Diva” is usually the best singer in the choir (or at least she thinks she is). She is known to act like she is God’s gift to the choir. You may even hear “The Diva” make a comment like: “I need to save my voice for my lead.”
The Lazy Alto
This person is usually a female. She sings in the alto section, but she has soprano range. She is just too lazy to sing the higher notes. You can spot the lazy alto, because she is the one who rolls her eyes and sucks her teeth when the choir director asks the alto section to stand up and sing a particular portion of a song.
The Vibrato Tenor
This person is usually a male and he is usually one of the loudest voices in the choir. He sings with a whole LOT of vibrato. It sounds like he is holding a jackhammer while he is singing. You can notice “The Vibrato Tenor”, because he will be the one with his mouth wide open and his head will be shaking up and down while he is singing.
The Late Person
This is the choir member who always shows up late to choir rehearsal. Nobody can explain why this happens. “The Late Person” is known to walk in and try to hold full-fledged conversations while the director is trying to teach a song. It is amazing how the late person can always show up on time whenever the choir needs to sing in front of a large group of people.
The Pastor
This person really isn’t the pastor of the church, but he/she acts like it. “The Pastor” likes to give off the impression that they are the most spiritually deep person in the choir. When asked how they are doing, “The Pastor” always says “I’m blessed and highly favored!” When “The Pastor” answers their phone, he/she always says: “Praise the Lord,” instead of saying “hello”. When “The Pastor” is asked to pray before or after choir rehearsal, you can bet that he/she will give a nice loooooong prayer.
Now it is your turn. I know I’m probably leaving a bunch of people out. Tell me about some of the people you see in choir rehearsal.
