The Minister’s Guide To Sin, Sex and Relationships: Lesson 8 – Don’t Be Afraid To Get Help

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. There is no such thing as a perfect marriage. You may have some friends or family members that appear to have the perfect marriage. I assure you, they were faced with their fair share of challenges.

Most of the times a couple can overcome these challenges on their own with a little help from God. There are other instances in which intervention or assistance from a 3rd party is needed. Don’t be afraid to get help if you run into difficulties in your marriage. This extra assistance can come from a variety of sources like marriage counselors and pastoral staff.

Allow me to clear something up. Getting help for your marriage does not make you any less of a man or woman. In fact, it makes you extremely smart. There is no shame in having a problem. The real shame comes when you know you have a problem and fail to address it.

The Bible provides support for seeking advice and council (Proverbs 12:15, Proverbs 19:20). A third party will bring a fresh perspective to your situation. It really isn’t about picking sides or pointing the finger at someone. The important thing is getting to the core of your issues and developing a resolution that everyone agrees to pursue.

What Getting Help is Not
Getting help is not running to your friends and proceeding to have a gripe session about your spouse. That may make you feel good, but that won’t accomplish much.

Please understand that there is a difference between asking a friend for advice and having a gripe session. When a friend is giving you good Godly advice they won’t let you bad mouth your spouse. They will try to hear your concerns and offer suggestions. They should not be encouraging bad feelings towards your spouse.

What Getting Help Is
When you have the right person helping you with your marriage, you have someone who won’t be choosing sides. You’ll have someone who will be unbiased. The goal won’t be to place the blame on you and your spouse. The goal will be to sort out your differences and come to a resolution that will benefit the entire marriage.

When seeking to get help, I suggest that you do it sooner rather than later. One of the worst things you can do is just to sit back and wait assuming things will magically get better. A successful marriage requires sacrifice and investment. Getting help for your marriage is an investment in your present and future. You may have to sacrifice a little bit of your pride and a little bit of your time. In the end, you will find that it was well worth it.

What are you thoughts about this? Have you had any experience getting help for your marriage?

The Minister’s Guide to Sin, Sex and Relationships
Lesson 1: Know Your Opponent
Lesson 2: Never Be Alone With The Opposite Sex
Lesson 3: The Importance of Communication
Lesson 4: Christian Sacrifice
Lesson 5: Get An Accountability Partner
Lesson 6: Attend A Christian Marriage Conference or Seminar
Lesson 7: Guard Your Eyes, Heart and Mind

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