The Minister’s Guide To Sin, Sex and Relationships: Lesson 9 – Talk About Sex

In a previous lesson I addressed the importance of communication. In this lesson, I’m going to go a step further and talk more specifically about sex.

Most churches do not address sex openly. It is a shame, because so many believers succumb to sexual sin. Sex is not something that we should be afraid to discuss. A good way to maintain strength in your marriage is to talk about sex regularly with your spouse. 

We all have our own wants and desires when it comes to sex. We all have different things that trigger our emotions whether they be physical or psychological. Does your spouse really know what is important to you?

I strongly believe that it is God’s desire for every married Christian to be satisfied sexually. Unfortunately, that is not always the case. There are women who fake orgasms for years without their husbands ever knowing. There are men that have lost physical attraction to their wives and never tell them. 

When people aren’t being satisfied by their spouses, they sometimes turn to other areas for satisfaction. They find pleasure in the fantasy world that is created by pornography. They go outside of their marriage and find sexual comfort in someone that is not their husband or wife. 

Don’t get me wrong. I am fully aware that the lack of sexual satisfaction is not the only reason why people turn to pornography or commit adultery.

We must have discussions about sex with our spouses. Put everything on the table. Talk about what turns you on and what makes you happy. Talk about what you need emotionally. Talk about frequency. Talk about what you don’t like too. None of us are mind readers. Our spouses will never know what we need unless we talk about it. 

Please have these discussions all of the time and not just when the sex is bad. Even when the sex is great it is important for both parties to continue to express their feelings. Talking will allow the great sex to continue and it won’t get stagnant. 

Lack of sex, love and intimacy is just one of the reasons why marriages fall apart. The choice really up to you. You can have a marriage with limited love, no intimacy and average to below average sex. The alternative would be to have a marriage that is strong in love, has a high level of passionate intimacy and mind-blowing sex. Which one do you want?

What are your thoughts on this? How do you deal with sex in your marriage?

The Minister’s Guide to Sin, Sex and Relationships
Lesson 1: Know Your Opponent
Lesson 2: Never Be Alone With The Opposite Sex
Lesson 3: The Importance of Communication
Lesson 4: Christian Sacrifice 
Lesson 5: Get An Accountability Partner
Lesson 6: Attend A Christian Marriage Conference or Seminar
Lesson 7: Guard Your Eyes, Heart and Mind
Lesson 8: Don’t Be Afraid To Get Help

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