Top 5 reasons why deacons sleep during the word of God

deacon-asleepI was on facebook yesterday and one of my friends (Marlon) asked the question “Why do deacons sleep during the word of God?” When you think about it, this is one of those age old questions that has been going through the church for years. It ranks right up there with “Is there any word from the Lord?” and “Can I get a witness?”.

After reading the responses from some other people, I decided to develop a top five list. So, here are the top five reasons why deacons fall asleep during the word of God:

5. They work nights. I never really understood this reason. Even if a deacon does work nights Monday-Friday, they have off all day Saturday and church is on Sunday.

4. They are tired from the long morning prayer. Many churches have the deacons pray at the beginning of the service. After dropping such powerful lines like “you woke me up this morning” and “blood running warm in my veins” can you blame them for being worn out by the time the preacher gets up?

3. They are resting up to count the money after church. We all know that deacons go into that secret room after church and count the offering. Most people don’t really know what goes on in that room. We’re probably better off not knowing.

2. The preacher is boring and long winded. We’ve all been in a service where the preacher is going on and on about a bunch of nonsense. Unfortunately, he thinks he is bringing a powerful word, but the rest of the congregation is checking facebook on their phones, daydreaming about what’s for dinner after church, or sleeping (especially if you are a deacon).

1. They were involved in some extracurricular activities last night. You can insert whatever you want here. It could be they were partaking in some adult beverages. It could be because they were doing some laying on of hands. It could be any number of things.

Others receiving votes:
They are not really sleep they are just praying.
They are just resting their eyes.
They always snore when they’re slain in the spirit.

Do you have any others to add to the list?

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